Total Recall: Movie Review

Total Recall: Movie Review

Cast: Colin Farrell, Kate Beckinsale, Jessica Biel, Bryan Cranston, John Cho, Bill Nighy
Director: Len Wiseman

It's the 2012 version of Total Recall...this time with no Arnie in sight.

Following the break out of a chemical Third World War which devastated the planet, the world is divided into two major colonies in the 21st Century - the United Federations of Britain and The Colonies.

The two ends of the Earth are joined by a giant gravity elevator, The Fall, which joins them via the Earth's core - and is used daily as a commute for the workers. 

Factory worker Douglas Quaid (Farell) leads a boring existence; he has a crummy job working on building robot synthetic police, lives in a bit of a slum and with a beautiful wife, Lori (Beckinsale).

Troubled by nightmares in which he appears to be a spy, Quaid decides to visit Rekall, a company which provides its clients with fake memories of a life they'd like to lead.

But when the trip to Rekall goes haywire, Quaid finds himself on the run.

This Total Recall remake ramps up the political aspects of the original and leaves aside any notion of anything other than mediocrity.

Granted, Wiseman's created a dark and greying dystopian future, with cityscapes which have hints of Blade Runner and slums proliferating his United Federal Britain and the Colonies.

But it's a CGI shade too far and gives the whole experience a distinct computer game feel, with sections playing out like the latest videogame - escape from Rekall, escape over rooftops, run from the synths, avoid your wife who's trying to shoot the hell out of you etc etc.

Still it is Len Wiseman after all - he who created the slow mo violence of the Underworld series, a trick he employs once again here as bullets fly right from the start.

Farrell acts better than Schwarzenegger (that's a given perhaps) but there is never any real edge to his continually confused and on the run Quaid throughout; Biel is a little more than just wet as his resistance co-fighter, Nighy is criminally underused as the leader of the insurgence, Matthias; Cranston manages to keep it the right side of evil rather than hamming it up as Cohaagen, a politico hell-bent on world domination and Beckinsale is a hard faced but yet pouty would be killer/wife from hell.

Shots of hordes of white synthetic robots toward the end recall Attack of the Clones; there's no trip to Mars as in the original and the whole thing has an inexorable sense of deja vu.

Yet occasionally, there are some pleasing visual touches- a flying car chase scene provides some thrills and breaks up the continual Farrell vs Beckinsale chases; plus some of the potential upgrades of technology deployed look totally plausible and just within our reach.

It's a shame because the 2012 version of Total Recall could have done with a little more of that spark of originality rather than trotting out predictably formulaic action sequences which make the whole film instantly forgettable and present a spectacle, lacking in real grandeur. Whereas the original film had iconic moments and ones which have lived on for good or for bad, this latest, really doesn't have anything which lingers long in the mind afterwards.

In summary, my question is a simple one - where do I sign up to get my memory wiped?

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The Forgiveness of Blood: DVD Review

The Forgiveness of Blood: DVD Review

Rating: PG
Released by Madman Home Entertainment

Blood feud may not be something many of us know too much about, but in some countries it's a way of life.

Joshua Marton directs this story about honour and how 2 teens from the same family are caught up in one such feud after their father and friend kill a neighbour over a land access issue.

However, the eldest boy Nik doesn't realise his leaving the house after the feud is invoked could result in his death.

Angry at the confines of the past ruining his life,he tries to find a way out-and it's one which could see him forced to leave his life behind.

Sensationally performed by two unknown young actors,this drama is slow burning and powerful from beginning to end;with a fascinating story sensitively handled by an excellent director, it's truly stand out stuff which sees innocence shattered by choices, cultures and obligations imposed on family bonds by those who're no longer around. 

Highly recommended and one of the best dramas on show this year - well, so far anyway.

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Battleship: Blu Ray Review

Battleship: Blu Ray Review

Rating: M
Released by Universal Home Entertainment

From director Peter Berg, comes Battleship the film based on the boardgame we all played in our youth.

Taylor Kitsch stars as Alex Hopper, who starts the film as a kind of feckless waster and out with his brother Stone (Skarsgard) to celebrate his birthday; when in walks blonde bombshell Samatha (Decker). Smitten, Hopper ends up being tasered and arrested after breaking in to a convenience store to get some food to impress the girl....

Tired of his brother's mess ups, Stone, a Commanding officer in the Navy enlists his brother - cue a little while later and the pair are about to embark on naval war games. But Alex can't stay out of trouble and one altercation later with colleagues on the boat and he's facing being kicked out of the navy at the end of the games.

Trouble is the boss of the navy (Liam Neeson) also happens to be Samantha's dad - whom Alex needs to get permission from for marriage...

That's the least of his worries when an alien invasion force, known as the Regents, shows up in the middle of the games, having been contacted by a signal sent from Earth years ago....and they're not here to play, throwing up shields and keeping the world's armed forces out..

Soon, Earth's under threat and it's all down to the naval team, who's trapped within the shield to try and save the day....

It's hard to know exactly where to start with Battleship.

There's a scene in the trailer where Alexander Skarsgard's character is smacked across the face with a soundwave emitted from the bad guys and staggers around stunned, bloodied and lost.

That's something a little similar to how I felt during parts of Battleship as the loud, brash, FX heavy and slightly cheesy, occasionally tongue in cheek flick unrolled one action scene after another. But yet, there are moments where Berg pays such homage and respect to America's navy, it's hard to fault his intentions amid this testosterone FX fuelled rampage through blockbuster territory.

It's a gung ho piece - complete with patriotism aplenty as we take in the all American way; from a football game between Japan and American navy sides to a shot of a kid turning around sucking down a Subway drink (sponsorship anyone?) this is the kind of film which salutes the very best of America and gives it a moment on the screen.

And yet, when Berg takes a quieter approach to matters, he's to be saluted. He shows the full cost of being involved in wars and conflicts by giving Brooklyn Decker a job as a physioin an army rehab centre - and then whirls the camera around the various people afflicted by it all. (Well, right before pairing her off with an amputee who's lost his sense of worth having lost both his legs and sending them off on a quest).

Plus the sequence when the old timers are rolled out onto the final Battleship to help take down the bad guys, is the kind of thing you should really stand and salute in the cinema. All set to a raucously loud AC/DC/ generic heavy rock soundtrack, you can pretty much tell what you're gonna get with this side order of cheese.

At the end of the day, I think you know what to expect with a film like this - one that's occasionally a little more than Transformers in the water - it's a brash, ballsy, blockbuster sized slice of patriotic cheese which pummels your mind and eyeballs into submission as it rolls out over its two hours of pure brain at the door big dumb fun.

If you're going to this looking for sheer entertainment and huge no brainer thrills, then it's for you. If you're going looking for depth, then, sailor, you're all washed up.

Extras: Tour of USS Missouri, Alternate ending, preparing for battle, visual effects, the game trailer

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The Sitter - Blu Ray Review

The Sitter - Blu Ray Review

Rating: R16
Released by 20th Century Fox Home Ent

Jonah Hill heads back to the comedy stable with this R-rated fodder.

Hill is Noah, a stay at home slacker who ends up babysitting three kids to help his mum out one night. But when he gets a booty call from his on and off girlfriend, he decides to grab the kids and take them out for the night so that he can get his end away.

But that's where the problems start - each of the kids has their issues and the night gets more complicated when Noah ends up getting on the wrong side of Sam Rockwell's dealer, Karl....

The Sitter is formulaic stuff, with its main star seeming like he's simply on auto pilot.

While Hill's watchable enough, the plot is so painstakingly obvious and the humour so transparently easy to spot a mile off, even the writers phoned it in. The child actors are so - so with the youngest girl sporting a potty mouth thanks to rap songs, a foreign kid revelling in all the stereotypes and an uptight kid holding a big secret.

The Sitter is neither clever nor original - while it's mercifully short, it still fails to deliver big belly laughs and even with claims of a totally irresponsible edition (six minutes of extra nothingness), it's not a memorable R rated comedy by any stretch of the imagination.

Extras: Deleted, alternate and extended scenes, gag reel, making of and outtakes.

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Project X : DVD Review

Project X : DVD Review

Rating: R18
Released by Warner Home Video

Three anonymous American high schoolers, three losers and three guys who want to make a name for themselves.

Thomas, Costa, JB (and cameraman Dax) decide that to celebrate Thomas' birthday, they should throw him a party which just happens to coincide with Thomas' parents leaving for the weekend.

Thomas' Dad gives him a warning - sets boundaries for what he believes will just be his three friends hanging around; don't go in my office, don't touch my car, don't drink etc.

However, Costa decides to invite everyone, with Thomas thinking they will be lucky they'll get a few people given their rep.

But, when truckloads of people start to show, the party soon turns from underrated to epic. And chaotic.

Project X is the kind of film teens will love and hardly anyone else.

Its main trio are unlikeable, their behaviour repugnant and the morals on display completely questionable. Drugs, sex, topless teens, drinking, an angry dwarf put in an oven (???) are just the gamut of what's explored here in this found footage film.

Granted the anarchy is impressive and the use of footage from hundreds of extras is well utilised but the overall feel of the film is one that's questionable - so much so, that at the end when Thomas is being berated by his father, his dad has some kind of admiration for him as he'd previously believed his son was "a loser". It's an interesting paradigm that over the years, this kind of behaviour's become more acceptable and even to be aspired to.

Project X is squarely going to hit its target audience, but if you have friends like this, you may want to check whether your parents have insurance. And plenty of it.

Extras: Pasadena Three

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Ghost Rider Spirit of Vengeance: Blu Ray Review

Ghost Rider Spirit of Vengeance: Blu Ray Review

Rating: M
Released by Warner Home Video

When a package shouts loudly that it's from the producers of Crank, maybe you will have an idea what's ahead.

Nicolas Cage (in OTT loony mood) is back as Johnny Blaze, who's struggling with his curse and trying to lie low in Eastern Europe.

But when he's recruited to try and save a young boy from the devil, it looks like Blaze has no choice but to embrace his fiery side and use the Rider to save the day.

Ghost Rider Spirit of Vengeance is nothing short of bonkers and nothing short of quite disappointing.

The directors should really have dialled back Cage's craziness - sure, it's based on a comic strip, but thanks to a pointless plot and some not particularly eye catching CGI, it ends up being nothing more than a mess to be honest. Sure, it's going for trashy but it never quite hits the mark - and while Idris Elba and Ciaran Hinds add a certain class to the story, they can't do enough to save it.

Extras: Video commentary, deleted scenes and a doco

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Hope Springs: Movie Review

Hope Springs: Movie Review

Cast: Meryl Streep, Tommy Lee Jones, Steve Carell
Director: David Frankel

Welcome to the world of Twilight sex.

Not Edward and Bella - this is an altogether less supernatural phenomenon, although frankly, no less terrifying.

Meryl Streep's Kay and Tommy Lee Jones' Arnold have been married for over 30 years.

They're in the later years of life, and also their love life. Stuck in an endless routine - the same eggs and bacon for Arnold for breakfast every day, the same Arnold slumped asleep, watching the golf channel at night and the same separate bedrooms without a hint of intimacy - Kay decides enough is enough.

Rather than walking out the door, Kay enrols Arnold and herself in a week long intensive couples therapy clinic run by Steve Carell's Dr Feld.

Unsurprisingly, Arnold's against the whole idea and is cynical about being involved in the first place. As time goes on though, the pair begin to discover intimacies about each other held long locked away and face truths which could prove difficult to overcome.

Hope Springs is a dramedy, with the emphasis more on reality and drama than endless bouts of sex comedy.

Streep and Lee Jones are perfectly matched and deft at breathing life into this somewhat unoriginal story. Sure, we've all been to films where couples are having trouble but this one is adept at putting the story squarely into the latter stages of life. Both the leads bring a light comedic touch to a tale which is essentially downbeat and seriously dramatic in parts. They lift the duo from being stereotypes and give them a warmth and humanity which makes you empathise with them - and Kay and Arnold's situation - immediately and as the film goes on. both handle what's asked of their characters wonderfully. Sure, there are comedic moments which are required of both but the drama lingers long after the humour's worn off and as the therapy (both for the audience and the characters) grinds on.

Equally, Carell who spends most of the time smiling sympathetically is incredibly convincing in his dialled-down turn as the therapist.

That's the thing with Hope Springs - it has a hefty dose of reality which may hit a little too close to home for some in the audience; there's a tenderness and honesty to the script which may cut to the quick but has its roots squarely in something which may face many in years to come.


Hope Springs is quite a serious piece - despite how knockabout the trailer initially appears, with a pace that may actually give you the feeling that it's infinitely longer than it is.

However, you should also be aware that there's plenty of squirm in your seat moments as we have the duo discuss their sex lives, watch Meryl's character Kay literally get in touch with herself and hear sex talk that may frankly put you off any meal you may be about to have...It's to be applauded for getting this kind of thing on the big screen, a rare feat in Hollywood these days, but for some in the audience not over a certain age, it could be a hard ask.

But what you should be impressed with in Hope Springs is an adult dramedy that really does explore what it's like to be older, and dealing with issues of intimacy and attraction - with two very impressive performances by Tommy Lee Jones and Meryl Streep.

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